My Roommates Ex Girlfriend Asked Me For A Facial

Oh, okay.

Well, Brian's not even here.

Oh, don't even talk to me about Brian.

Nah. We broke up.

Are you serious?

Yeah.

He's a freaking asshole and I don't know why I didn't do it sooner.

And so I'm just getting some of my things that I left here.

And I'm gonna get the fuck out.

Damn.

So you're just, you're just uh,

I feel like that happened kind of fast. Y'all seemed alright like last week.

I mean, it seemed alright, but like,

he just,

I don't know, he,

I just can't. I'm more,

he has a small dick, so I mean, I'm not gonna put up with a guy

Oh, shit.

who is shit if they have a small dick.

So, not even gonna recommend it.

Yeah, right. There's like no redeeming qualities there, yeah.

Honestly, he is, he's kind of a douche. He's like,

he's like a shitty roommate.

Is he?

It doesn't surprise me that he's a douche.

And like washes dishes or fucking do anything.

Yeah, he's like kind of gross. Like, why do you put up with that?

I'm gonna evict him.

You're gonna evict him?

You could come live with me.

What? Shut up, you're gonna evict him?

Are you serious?

I don't know.

I'm getting my shit for now. I think this is like most everything I don't want to be here and be at home, so.

...